A spectre is haunting Twitter — of the microwave pasta dish Robert Pattinson cooked for his self-shot GQ cowl.
All of the powers of social media have entered right into a holy alliance to exorcise this demonic creation: Reporters for Mel Journal, Man Repeller and numerous different web provocateurs tried to make Pattinson’s model of piccolini cuscino — a proprietary recipe involving pasta, cheese, sugar and cornflakes smashed right into a tinfoil ball after which mistakenly put into the microwave as a substitute of the oven.
“The f–king electrical energy … Oh my God,” says Pattinson from the ground after the aluminum explodes within the profoundly unhinged interview.
The profile has deeply resonated with web denizens who, trapped in quarantine due to the coronavirus pandemic, discover the surrealist cooking failures of an objectively sizzling particular person to be extraordinarily relatable content material — a balm for the dreamlike state of nihilism many discover themselves in after accepting their destiny to indefinitely keep inside with restricted human interplay.
“Robert Pattinson cooking pasta in isolation is really…..an expertise,” tweets “Shrill” actress Niccole Thurman.
“Sorry how is it Robert Pattinson can prepare dinner sugar & cheese pasta within the f–king microwave and also you lot are nonetheless moist sizzling and spicy for him however when i do it it’s ‘we’re becoming concerned’ and ‘are you positive you’re coping okay?’ ” writes recommendation columnist Beth McColl.
“SNL writers want they might write one thing pretty much as good because the Robert Pattinson cooking pasta within the microwave ordeal,” tweets one other supporter of Pattinson’s affront to Italian cooking.
One fan of the “Twilight” and eventual “Batman” actor seems to be completely traumatized by their try to recreate the UK native’s carb-filled hellscape.
“I made the Robert Pattinson pasta sugar cheese sandwich and my evaluate is that the one option to describe the way it tastes is to think about going by way of all 5 of the kubler ross levels of grief concurrently,” writers person @Tormny_Pickeals.
Others have expressed concern for the birthday boy, who turned 34 on Wednesday.
“Everyone seems to be like, ‘Omg Robert Pattinson doesn’t know the best way to make pasta,’ ” writes one frightened person. “Guys Robert Pattinson doesn’t know the place he’s.”